Rain, Rain

Rain, Rain

It is said that rain washes away dirt.  It can bless circumstances.  Today, is one of those days.

I started blogging last year, but it never really showcased my many talents that God has granted me.  Therefore, this year I would love to share regularly things that I’ve made, tried, and/or have been inspired.

This morning when I woke up, it was already raining.  It felt like a snow day-a day of just staying in.  So, I ended up watching Charles Stanley’s “In Touch.”  He spoke on courage and why many of us don’t muster up to following through.

“COURAGE: The quality of mind or spirit enabling us to meet danger, face opposition, or the challenges of life with fearlessness, calmness, and firmness.” Charles Stanley 2017

That is what I truly hope and pray that I can inspire in anyone who reads this blog or any other blog thereafter.  It takes courage to try new things.  It also takes courage to showcase ideas, projects, and whatever comes my way.  I know that there are those who are better than me in all that I do.  I may or may not ever become better in those areas.  But, to not share what I’ve gained knowledge in, is just being plain selfish.

So, my first “Sharing is Caring” is my discovery of Amazon Fresh (If you click on the picture, it’ll take you to the site).

As most of you know, we, David & I live on the 2nd floor.  Every time I go grocery shopping, I have to find a spot on our street or park in the back and hope that David is home to help me carry this stuff up to our place.

Welcome Amazon Fresh.  I can grocery shop in the comforts of my home and even in my PJ’s.  I can have the freedom of shopping at 2am or truly look in my fridge to make sure I don’t really need the item.  Most importantly, I’m not overspending and buying things I really don’t need like Donettes or cupcakes.  I don’t see them, I don’t need them.  I can even look at the recipes of the week and go by that list and know I’m not forgetting anything…except for today.


Groceries come in this bag, that can be folded so that you can put multiple ones into one.  It gets delivered by the Post Office.  You just have to ask the delivery person to wait so that they’ll take the old ones away.  Cold food gets delivered with ice packs that stay frozen for at least 5 hours.  Click on the picture and it’ll take you to the site.  I’m telling you, you’ll never go grocery shopping again.  Until….

I forgot the main ingredient…the Beef.  Yes, Where’s the Beef?

So, after working on the computer for 45 minutes and playing with my Cricut Explore Air, I woke David up and we went to Starbucks and Trader Joe’s.

As we were walking to the Starbucks, the roof’s gutter was pouring out the water, making it look like a waterfall.  David points out, “Hey, it’s the backside of water.”  He will neverimg_1089

seize to amaze me with his wittiness, even after 14 years!

My second “Sharing is Caring” are the Sous Vide Egg Bites. So, I got both types.  The Bacon & Guyere was ok, and is 12 Weight Watcher Points, if I ate both (they come in 2’s).  The Egg White & Roasted Red Pepper was 6 points for 2, but since I was sharing, it really was 3 Weight Watcher Points.  The 3 points tasted better, even after finding out how many points they were.  Next time I get them, I’ll take a picture of it.  They’re pretty good in size and were quite filling.

Lastly, even though I made it a week ago and shared it, I love using my Cricut Air Explorer. I got it, because David wanted me to make Christmas Cards.  I wanted a new Cricut.  So, I was able to get one and have made my Christmas cards and now making other projects.  Right now, I’m designing Valentine Day Cards and decorations.  Yes, eventually I’d like to sell them.

So, here’s a small project that I’d like to leave all of you with.  Enjoy!img_1077

I needed to update this post, after David & I experienced the rain having an impact on my car.  It got flooded.

Tomorrow, David will help me getting it to the place we have all of the body work done, JRF Body Shop in Bellflower, CA.  They are a blessing, with the owner, Danny being larger than life, it’s easy going there and know that not only will you feel that you’re not just another source of their income; but, that you’re a friend that they can help.

Yeah, I got upset with David.  I even walked in the rain, getting drenched (hopefully not sick).  But, we will get through this.  I just have to ‘Let God, be God.’




Blessed as Always

img_0612The 3 things I’m most grateful for and constantly blessed by are
1. People who believe in me and truly are vested in my future, like my managers at work; my husband; and, my family.

2. The way my parents taught me that hard work will pay off eventually.

3. The idea and principle that my parents taught me that if a superior tells you to do something, do it without complaining or questioning. Just do it. And, that if you have nothing to do, find something productive to do. If need be, ask.

Awesome Things

Day 3 has me thinking of random but important things in my life.  They’re things that even though one might not agree, they do hold some type of importance in my life.

Even though hockey season started on October 12, I am able to enjoy a sport that is both exciting and allows me to talk to my husband. It’s also a great way for us to have some friendly competition as he likes the NY Rangers and I love the Anaheim Ducks.

Stepping stones are a reminder that life always going to be a challenge. We do have to walk gingerly at times to get through, so as to not fall into a pool of water. There are times that we can skip and get our feet wet. Also, it’s a bit of risk to get through life, if you’re trying to get from one place to another. But, in the end, once you’ve gotten to the other side, it was well worth it.

Lastly, the toilet. It’s known that the Jews have a prayer after they’ve used the restroom. It’s a prayer that allows them to thank God that they were able to have a bowel movement. This then means that the body is in working order.

As I say, sometimes I have plumbing problems. Well, life’s problems are like that as well. Yeah, the problem might have you tied in knots. You may have to really push through it. But, in the end, it allows you to have a sense of relief once it’s all done.

It’s also an item that allows us to have fun with potty jokes and sounds. Laughter is probably the best medicine to get through anything. If you can laugh through it all, you know that it’s not going to be that bad.

So, to leave you with a sense of gratitude and laughter, enjoy this scene! Please excuse the bad word in the title.


Thankful Thankful Day 2

So, it’s now day 2 and I still have more things to be thankful for.  It’s as though I’ve hit the jackpot of blessings from up above.

  1.  I’m so thankful for the place that I work at.  I am paid well, not only monetarily, but the support and friendships that I’ve received and the blessings I’m able to give to others are stacked upon each other, daily.ehi
  2. The ability and motivation to get up every morning at 4am and go to the gym that’s opened 24 hours.  It’s here that I am giving back to God for the body he’s given me, by taking care of it.24-hour_fitnesslogo
  3. I am thankful for people like Jeff Bezos who created and leads Amazon.  This company founded AmazonFresh, which has revolutionized my grocery shopping.  I now do my shopping online and have them deliver it.  No more having to call or make sure that David is home to help me carry the supplies up to our place.  No more having to go to the store and mindlessly buy food we don’t need.amazon_fresh

So, yeah, this post may look like a plug for these companies.  But, if it weren’t for Jack Taylor, we wouldn’t have the company Enterprise Rent a Car or even Alamo or National.  UBER drivers would only have one place to go to rent cars for their business.  But, more importantly, I wouldn’t have found my dream place to work for.

God bless Mark Mastrov who had the vision that having a gym opened 24 hours would allow people to take care of their fitness at any time of the day.

Again, Jeff Bezos has my blessings for allowing me to shop from home, buy printer ink at a great price, clothing, and even my groceries.

Yeah, this may also appear to be materialistic.  But, in this great country of ours, where capitalism helps run this country; and, health, wealth, and basic necessities are obtained through these companies, it boils down to why am I truly thankful for these places?

So, my question to you is what are your 3 companies that you are eternally thankful for?

Grateful, Grateful

Hopefully this goes through


This is November 1st and it is the month to reflect on things that we are grateful and thankful for.  Each day I’m going to post 3 things that I’m grateful and thankful for.  Share, like, repost, or just ponder if you’d like.

So, the 3 things I’m grateful and thankful for are

  1.  My friends and family.  Whether it’s our good friend Tomoko from Japan, my Guatemalan sister, or my seester from birth.  Each one has a special place in my heart and has shaped me into the woman I am today.img_0052
  2. My husband of 14 years.  We can argue or get upset or even disappoint each other with our actions or words.  But, we also know how to forgive each other and still love each other at the end of the day.fullsizeoutput_327.jpeg
  3. The ability to have finished my degree.  It is with this degree, that has made me officially…

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Grateful, Grateful


This is November 1st and it is the month to reflect on things that we are grateful and thankful for.  Each day I’m going to post 3 things that I’m grateful and thankful for.  Share, like, repost, or just ponder if you’d like.

So, the 3 things I’m grateful and thankful for are

  1.  My friends and family.  Whether it’s our good friend Tomoko from Japan, my Guatemalan sister, or my seester from birth.  Each one has a special place in my heart and has shaped me into the woman I am today.img_0052
  2. My husband of 14 years.  We can argue or get upset or even disappoint each other with our actions or words.  But, we also know how to forgive each other and still love each other at the end of the day.fullsizeoutput_327.jpeg
  3. The ability to have finished my degree.  It is with this degree, that has made me officially more employable.  I now work at a place that I truly feel like I can be myself and grow both professionally and personally.p1080262

Day 46 In the Sink Hole


steaming kettle

Day 46 In the Sink Hole wakes me up with the morning dampness.  The night before I had slept in the Hole.  I then see the infamous ladder being lowered down.

“Goo mohningu!” exclaims Toshiko.

“I’m up.  Let me just gather my things.” I exclaim in return.

I make my way up the rungs of the ladder.  I notice that the ladder’s last run is actually sticking out of the hole quite noticeably.  Hmmm, there’s hope after all.

I then realize that I had asked Toshiko the night before to wake me up a half hour early, I needed to call a company on the East Coast.  I needed help in registering a product that I got for my science class.  That starts June 13th.

We get into the house and I go straight for the computer and call the company.  Oh good, someone actually answered.

I explain that I had gotten the material, but it’s asking for an access code, but I had erased accidentally.  The woman was sweet and kind and helped me reset it.  As we’re waiting for the computer to fire up again, I ask where I’m calling.

“Kentucky, really close to Cincinnati, Ohio,” she answers.

“Oh, My Husband is really big Cincinnati Reds Fan,” I explain.

“Oh, wow.  We’re actually going to their game tonight,” she converses back.

“Well, I hope you have fun,” I say.

The computer finally comes on and the program works.  I just need a code from the instructor now to start the courses.

I thank the kind woman and hang up.

I then email the professor, explaining that I now need a code, because since he wants an assignment done the first day of class, I don’t want to wait until the last minute to do it.  I also explain that I work until 5pm everyday.

Toshiko comes into the office, where we have the computer and asks, “Eburee singu ohritsu?”

“Yeah, I think so,” I answer.

It’s now off to the shower and getting ready for work.  As I’m starting the shower, I wonder what’s in store for me at work.  Lately, they’ve had me go to one of the branches to work there.

I hop into the shower and begin my prayer:

Dear Lord Jesus,

I’m really anxious for this class to start.  After much consideration, I truly want to work permanently for the company I’m at now and just need this class to be over with and I can then gain employment there.

I’m extremely grateful that they’re patient with me and always want the best for me and from me.

Thank you that I was able to experience the branch and see what it’s like.  That was the much needed nail for me to make the decision on wanting to work for them.

Thank you that everyone else that’s waiting for me to start making more money have been patient as well.

Thank you that the woman this morning was able to help me with this online course.

Please allow me to have a wonderful day at work, as You always let me have.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

As I’m getting ready and doing my hair, I just feel hopeful that everything is going to work out and that hope and faith are going to get me through any trial.

KROQ seems to be playing some throwback tunes that remind me of when I was 23-24.  Oddly enough at that time, I was going to school at LBCC and listening to the same thing.  With this whole school thing and moving back, lately, I feel like I’m getting a second chance on life.

When I arrive, I see PE waiting for the elevator.  Not realizing that he had stopped smoking, I ask, “How was it the past 2 days?”

“Taking your phone calls because you keep charging the customers’ credit cards,” he says quite rudely.

I explain, “Well, Boss Lady 2 didn’t say for me to call them.”

As he walks ahead of me, I stick my tongue out at him.  I also give him that snarky look that he deserves for greeting me in such a manner.  So much for the hopeful and positive attitude I was going to have today.

I then begin my work and remind myself that I am grateful that I don’t need to sit next to him anymore.  It is then that I over hear him say that he’s trying to quit smoking.  Ohhh, hence the reason why he was so rude.  He should be so grateful that I haven’t turned on him, as any Gemini would have, a long time ago.

I’ve never been into the horiscopes, maybe the occasional looking at the newspaper of what fortunes may lay ahead.  But, I do look at personality and try to judge accordingly to the patterns of that personality and see if I can meet them half way.  So, yes, in that retrospect of having an ‘evil twin’, the angry side, the rotten side, can make its appearance.

As the day goes on, I see TR and tell her about the class and that it will be done on July 16th.  It is then that I ask if I should start the paperwork or wait.  She gives me the green light.  Alright, by this weekend, I will have adjusted my resume and will send in my application.  I was on Cloud 9, once again.

But, Cloud 9 became gray clouds when I get a call from the school where this class is going to take place, because the registrar’s office couldn’t see if I had taken a biology class.  I tell the woman I’m eating my lunch and at work.  I can’t do this until 5pm.  She needed this done by the morning, or I would be dropped from the class.

I go out for my walk, because I’m just distraught.  I call out to God, “Why is this happening?”

I call My Husband and explain everything.

When I get back, I tell Boss Lady 2 that I need to run home and will be back.  I’ve got an emergency to take care of.

I get home and frantically try to find my transcripts from LBCC that says I took the human biology class.  I was told straight out that all I needed was a biology class and I could take this course.

I find it!  I then frantically copied and pasted it onto an email to this person and hope that she gets it.

I get back to work in less than 30 minutes, but know that I’ll need to stay the extra 30 to make up for it.  That’s fine, I have tons of stuff I need to do, because before lunch, I found out that I’d be going back to the branch in the morning!

Around 4, I get a text from My Husband.  After that, a friend of mine calls.  I can’t talk to either one, since I’m knee deep into a project.

I don’t get out of work until 6!  I think that’s the latest I’ve ever stayed.  I didn’t get anything I needed to do done, since T&E’s were due today. I’m told that tomorrow I’m to go to the branch, again to help out, since I spoiled them there!  I just hope that my hard work pays off and I can get a permanent position.

As I leave the office, I see that I have a voicemail from the school.  The woman who told me from the very get go that all I needed was a biology class, and even up to the point of telling me that I was going to get dropped, if I didn’t have a biology course, then tells me that I have the WRONG biology course!  It is then that I start to doubt God.  I then hear, “I can get you into the lecture part, but I need to hear from you.”

There’s no time recorded for me to call back by a certain time or what time she gets in.  I’m fuming in my car, on the way home.

When I get home, I’m about to blow steam like a teapot.  Toshiko tries to calm me down.  My Husband tries to calm me down.

It is then that Numbers 11:12-15 is revealed to me.  I had written this verse down awhile ago when I was listening to Joyce Meyers.  It says:

Moses said to God, “Why are you treating me this way? What did I ever do to you to deserve this? Did I conceive them? Was I their mother? So why dump the responsibility of this people on me? Why tell me to carry them around like a nursing mother, carry them all the way to the land you promised to their ancestors? Where am I supposed to get meat for all these people who are whining to me, ‘Give us meat; we want meat.’ I can’t do this by myself—it’s too much, all these people. If this is how you intend to treat me, do me a favor and kill me. I’ve seen enough; I’ve had enough. Let me out of here.” (The Message)

Although it’s not people per se that I have to carry and take care of, but it’s this one little tiny 1 unit course that needs to be done.  Everytime I think that it’s going to be done and over with, there’s another glitch.  Then, there’s another glitch.  It’s either the school won’t allow me or they want more from me.  When will it stop?!?

Yes, I was worried I’d have nothing to do and would need to find things to fill up my time, but this is ridiculous.  I explain this to Toshiko and he says, “Payshon.  Satan wants tsu getsu you.  He knowzu you ah churyingu tsu do God’s wahku.  God knowzu you mahstu taku curassu.  He werru maku way.  Onree need to taku rekcha tsu?  Ok.  So do.  Mahnee werru be zayah.  No warreesu.  Dontsu be riku EEzureeritsu.  Monku, monku, monku. (complain)”

He then continues, “Warree maykus beega horru.  Payshon maykus horru sumoru.”

He’s got a point-Worrying is only going to make the hole bigger.  But if I’m patient, it’ll make the hole smaller.

I think I’m stuck on the principle of it all, that I already had a bio class and even went to cosmetology school and yet no one cares about those courses.  I think I’m also stuck on the fact that it’s going to cost money to get this done.  Really?!?  The more time I worry about the paying part, the less time I have to get the stuff and start the class.  Yes, it’s two classes in 4 weeks.  But, Girl, we’ve done this before.  All you need is just a passing grade.  Don’t let the Japanese part or the Asian part get the best of you.  Be the American, and just get by and then all will be done.

Toshiko knows that I’m in deep thought.  So, he urges us to go to the Sink Hole to talk about this.

When we get there, I explain what I was thinking and then continue, “Now I know why it took the Isrealites FOREVER to get from point A to point B in 40 years, rather than in 2 weeks.  They kept complaining and murmuring about what they had to face and what they had to do.  If they just kept their mouth shut and just started moving towards Point B, the Promise Land, they would’ve gotten there a lot faster.  Yes, the woman should’ve looked at the transcripts much earlier and told me about the problem A WHOLE LOT EARLIER.  SHE HAD PRACTICALLY 4 WEEKS to tell me all this and she’s telling me 5 days before the start of class!”

Toshiko and My Husband look at me for further words.

I continue, “I have been doing good.  I have been trusting God, until now.  It’s when we stop doing this, is when we lose hope and faith that good things are going to happen.  If I need to take the class, then take the class.  I can’t let this one little tiny unit that I will never use be the defining moment of my schooling.  I can’t let 3 units get in the way of my whole entire life.  I didn’t come this far, only to give up now.  But, the real fight isn’t the principle of having taken the class, but to actually get through the class.”

It is then that Toshiko starts jumping up and down praising God, because I’ve finally realized that I need to learn to pick my battles.  Fight for the class, in that fight to get through it, not having to take it, and then it being the defining moment of my whole entire life.  So what, it’s only 4 weeks and $150.00 more plus books. We’ve got gas in the cars and food on the table, a roof over our heads and clothes on our backs.  The money I use for this will be given back ten times fold, once it’s all over and done with and I’m in the career that I’m trying to fight for.

Toshiko is so proud of me that he orders me to put 10 scoops of dirt into the Hole.  He then orders David to put another 10 scoops because he’s been a saint through this whole time and just supporting me in his own way and being my number 1 cheerleader.

It was tough to get the final tenth scoop, but it was well worth it.

I’ve realized that this other class I will have to take will take more time away from me this summer and allowing me to apply for the job, I will a lifetime to either regret that I ended my schooling this way or am able to share my experience with others.

Toshiko tells me that I can sleep in the house tonight as well.  I deserved it.

The three of us walk towards the house, as we’ve realized that we didn’t eat dinner and we were all getting hungry.  I ask, “Onaka ga suita nani o tabetai?” I’m getting hungry, what’s there to eat?

Toshiko answers, “Shirimasen.” I don’t know.

My Husband says, “I’m eating leftover past from last night that my wife made.”


Day 45 In the Sink Hole


Day 45 in the Sink Hole has me waking up in my own bed, again; not that I’m complaining.  In fact, I hope I don’t get used to this that when I do have to go back to the Sink Hole, I am not fighting it.

Right on the dot, I hear Toshiko coming up the stairs.  He’s even singing a happy tune.  He must’ve had friends over to watch the movie last night.

I get myself up and to the door to open it for him.

“Ohayo,” I greet him.

“Ohayo, genki desu ka?” he asks.

“Hai,” I answer.

I then go and do my sit ups as Toshiko goes to the kitchen to make my breakfast and lunch.  I remind him that I would like cereal this morning.

I made a goal for the month of June to do at least 3200 sit up and 400 push-ups, along with my walking and going to the gym.

In fact, last night I had made a list of 16 things I wanted to accomplish for the month of June, along with the normal daily stuff.  So, for the next few days, I will record those and do an update on each one with Toshiko.

Before I hop into the shower, I explain this to Toshiko and told him he could look through my scheduling book on the kitchen counter to see what all I want to accomplish and what my end goal is.

My goal, if I can accomplish at least 90% of daily stuff and 90% of the monthly goals is to give myself a spa day.  I had received a gift card for my graduation and would like to treat myself.

The next goal is for me to apply to 6 different places.  I love where I’m working.  But, I think I’m going stale.  It’s the going stale that gets me into trouble.  Toshiko nods his head in understanding.

I then hop into the shower and say my prayer.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank you for another wonderful day.  I know that there are those who don’t see each day as a gift from you, nor do they look forward to another day.  I should know, as I was there a few moons ago.

Thank you for allowing me to work at a great place.  But, I know that I’m starting to grow stale.  If it is YOUR will, please allow me to find another place of employment.  I know, trust You, do good, and work on it.

Thank you for giving me Hope and a second, third, fourth chance at everything in life.  I may be starting all over each time I have to start again, but at least we get the starting right and the path going in the right direction.

Thank you for giving me talents and gifts that I can share with others.  I may at times feel over burdened by them, but in the end, I love to see the smile the person has when I’m able to share with them.

Thank you for allowing My Husband to go back into the library field.  I know that he’s been waiting for a long time for this.  Please allow him to absorb any new information and be a positive influence in the workplace.

I pray these things in your most holy name, Amen.

I finish my shower and realize that my hair products are starting to run low.  Ugh!  My hair will look a bit stringy today, but it’ll do.  I don’t have time to straighten it.

I can hear Toshiko rummaging around in the kitchen and whistling at the same time a Japanese tune.  Most of the time, I’m annoyed when people whistle, but with him, it’s a motivating factor to make this day a joyful one.

When I finally pull myself together to go out the door, I realize that I still need to take some stuff to work.  Toshiko asks, “Why you nahtsu do deesu rastu nahtsu?”

“Uh, good question.  I was ironing my clothes and My Husband’s and doing a few other things,” I replied.

Finally!  Everything is ready and I’m going out the door.  As I go out, Toshiko asks, “When you cureen uhpu housu?”

Bleh, was all I could think of for a response to myself.  Yes, I know the house needs to be cleaned.  I know I don’t have an excuse now that I’m not in school.  I’ve been working on it.  The kitchen looks 90% normal.  We’re able to eat at the table, now that it’s not an art table.  That’s another thing I have on my To Do List for my daily chores.  When I get home, I need to put at least 15 things away.

Toshiko knows I’m not going to answer, so he doesn’t press the issue.

I finally get myself off and running to work.

Since I didn’t have work the day before, everything is double the pleasure, double the fun today.  At least I don’t have the chargebacks to do anymore.  Although, I really enjoyed doing them.  It really made me use my head and seek to find answers that we could use to fight for the money that was owed to us.  This is another reason why I feel that I’m going stale here.

El Jefe is even getting to me.  Last week, my desk was decked out in birthday décor and not once did he wish me a happy birthday.  I know that corporate America is like that, but his behavior as of late, is starting to show a different side.

I need to talk to Boss Lady 1 or 2 and see what I can do.  I would like to work for this company.  But, I now feel that there might be other places that I would like to work for as well.  I know, cast my cares; say my prayers.  I need to trust God and do good.  Furthermore, I can’t just sit on the sidelines hoping that something will happen, and not do anything.  What’s the worse they can say?  I have to stay but with the same pay and situation?  No, that’s not right.  I didn’t spend $40,000 for a piece of paper to say that I’m capable to doing more, only to do this.  I didn’t put all the hard work and effort to earn that paper, only to have appreciation by certain people and the company not acknowledge the position that I have.

Romans 12:1-2 (The Message) says:

So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

How I feel fits with this.  My growing stale falls under the idea of fitting into society and not have to think about my ordinary stuff in life.  So, God doesn’t want us to grow stale.  He wants us to truly be changing or growing.  It’s when we get out of the comforts of being adjusted to daily life that He shows what He can do for us.

The day just drags.  When it’s time to go home, I’m hungry and tired.

I call My Husband when I’m off and ask how his first day went.  But, we’re both so hungry, I suggest that he swing by Costco to get a chicken and I can warm up some vegetables.

I get home first and Toshiko is already in our place, hungry as well.  He’s like this cat or dog, waiting for its master to come home and give him some attention.  I like him, so I don’t complain, but actually enjoy doing it.

“Tadaima,” I’m home, I exclaim.

“Onaka ga suita, nani ga tabetai?” I’m hungry, what can I eat, Toshiko asks.

He’s also like a little kid that wants attention.  But, again, he’s so lovable, that it’s hard not to be angry with him, maybe annoyed sometimes.

“My Husband is bringing home some Costco Tori no niku,” I explain.  I then continue, “I’m going to warm up some vegetables and we have plenty of bread.”

“Oh soundzu goo,” He happily says.

“Why is it that you show up when we’re about to eat?” I ask.  I then say, “Don’t answer that.”

He just smiles.

I change my clothes and start on the vegetables.  My Husband gets home with piping hot chicken.  It looks wonderful!

I ask My Husband how his first day was.  His explanation was “like the first day of school.”  Awww, when someone can reference something from the past that is a positive influence, you know that they’re in a good place.

So, we sit around the table and talk about our day.  Toshiko and I ask My Husband everything about the library and the people.  Thank you Jesus, he’s at a place where he feels like he’s using his purpose, for now.

I explain to My Husband about the goals I have set out for myself.  He’s totally behind me, especially on the work situation.

After we’re done at the Sink Hole, I tell My Husband and Toshiko that I will clean up, the chicken is still too hot to handle.

I then ask Toshiko if it’s ok that I sleep in my bed, again tonight, as I would need to come back and clean up.  He agrees that this is ok.

I never thought that I would have to ask for permission to come back to my house.  But, after the exchange, I feel more free.  Call me crazy, but it was a freeing moment to ask for permission to do anything.  This then gave me hope and motivating factor to talk to at least Boss Lady 2 tomorrow.

We get over to the Sink Hole and Toshiko says a few words about how we’ve come a long way.  He explains that even though we’re not in a situation where the Sink Hole is filled and that are many factors that will help fill the hole, but it’s only through time, hard work, and patience, that will allow us to fill this Hole.  With this, he allows us to put 2 scoops each into the Hole.  He then instructs us to tell the other what they’ve done right for the day.

I go first, because I’m so proud of My Husband getting this job.  I tell him, “This job may only be part time, and pay little.  But, I see a different person standing before me.  I know that you can do anything when you set your mind to it.  I know that your stubbornness has allowed you to see this through.  So, with that, you can put 2 scoops.”

My Husband gets his turn and says, “Alicia, you’ve stuck with this job like it’s a permanent position.  You’ve gained a set of friends that you would never have gained, if you didn’t have the willingness to change.  I know that with it, you’ve put your trust in God to make sure that things work out for Him and not you.  So, with that, you can put 2 scoops.”

We then individually get the 6 biggest scoops that we could get with the shovel and pour it into the Sink Hole.  This time though, I don’t look down to see how much more we have left to go.  I know that it will eventually get to the top.  We just have to keep sticking to what we are doing, change things that need to be changed, and stop bad habits.  It is when all those components work together that the Hole gets filled.

Toshiko asks, “Why you nahtsu shee insidu?”

I then explain what I just thought.

Both My Husband and Toshiko look at me, agreeing that it’s all those components working together that good things happen, along with trusting God, doing Good.

My Husband announces that he must go to bed.

Toshiko offers to help me.  I can’t decline this offer.  So, I agree.

We three walk back together to the apartment.  We all have a different aura about ourselves that makes the other things that have happened at work or wherever negative experiences happened, go away.



Day 44 In the Sink Hole


Day 44 in the Sink Hole announces itself with My Husband calling me to tell me it’s 8:05am.  It feels nice to sleep in and in my own bed.  It’s even more nice because it’s a holiday.

I then hear Toshiko coming up the stairs.  I think, “He must know that today is a holiday.”  So, I get up and go unlock the door, before he starts pounding on the screen door.

“Ohayo,” I greeted him.

“Ohayo.  Genki desu ka?” are you well, he greets me.

“Hai, kiyo wa, yasumi desu.”  Today is a day off, I remind him.

“Hai, batsu you mahstu go to jeemu,” he says matter of factly.

“Ok, let me get myself ready,” I tell him as I let him in the door.

I then ask, “Are you coming with me?”  This I gotta see.  So, in a way, I hope he says yes.

“No.  Jastu camu oba to leemahndu you,” he says.

Darn!  Oh, well, all of our wishes can’t come true.

I get back into the livingroom and he’s watching Good Morning America.  They’re talking about making authentic tacos.  I try to hold back my opinions on what this day really is about and wonder why they’re showing authentic tacos.  Now, taco flavor burgers, that’s another take.  Guacamole on burgers and carne asada burgers, that’s assimilating to the American culture.  Yeah, Ok, whatever, I say to myself.

Toshiko sees this expression that I’ve made while thinking all of this and asks, “What you sanking?”

“Oh, nothing.  It’s truly nothing,” I apathetically say.  I then continue, “Are you sure you’re not coming?  Are you going to stay here?”

“Stay heeah,” He answers.

“Ok, I’ll be home in a couple of hours, I need to go to Target to pick up some stuff, since I got a gift card from there,” I explain.

“Ok, taku timu,” he answers.

As I’m going to the gym, I say my prayer in the car.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank you for this day that we have named Memorial Day.  Thank you for all the men and women that have died to keep this nation safe through all the wars that we’ve fought in the past, present, and future.

I can never thank you enough that I can live in a nation of ours that we can freely have a personal relationship with you and not have to worry about being caught.  It is because of these brave men and women that have sacrificed their lives so that I may have the freedom to pray to You in my car.

Thank you that today I have a free day to catch up on things and have another day of rest.

I pray now that as I go to the gym, I can have a really great work out and feel refreshed and renewed.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

I park my car and get my things together to go in and do some cardio and sit-ups.  I don’t plan on staying for more than 45 minutes, as I need to run to Target and then go home and try to clean up some, before making dinner.

The gym is a bit busy, as expected, for a holiday.  Hopefully, the elliptical works, as I’ve noticed some of the machines are starting to go broke.

I try one elliptical, I try to make it go down, but the number keeps saying “10”.  I think it’s going down, but I decide to use another one.  Again, it’s doing the same thing.  Finally, the third one works, but the heart rate indicator isn’t working.  Oh well, 1 out of 2 is not bad.  I plug in my iPod Shuffle and listen to everything from DC Talk to Smash Mouth.  Yes, I admit, I have a very eclectic taste in music.  I can never go bored.

While on the elliptical, I think of the past 2 days and realized that I haven’t done much.  This was one thing I could get away with while in school.  I always had something to do.  I could never go bored.  I’m starting to have that feeling.

Granted, I’m planning my career, trying to get my house back in shape, and getting myself back into shape; I still have that nagging feeling that every night I will come home from work and have that feeling of just plunking myself down in front of the tv until it’s time to go to bed.  Or, I’ll plunk myself down in front of the computer and surf the web, facebook, and shop, until it’s time to go to bed.

I then as reminded of the verse of Luke 22:41-44 (Message Bible)

He pulled away from them about a stone’s throw, knelt down, and prayed, “Father, remove this cup from me. But please, not what I want. What do you want?” At once an angel from heaven was at his side, strengthening him. He prayed on all the harder. Sweat, wrung from him like drops of blood, poured off his face.

I mean, I’m not sweating blood, yeah, sweat from being on this elliptical, but I’m thinking hard as to what God wants me to do next.

These past few months, I’ve been hearing from so many people that I should be proud that I was able to finish school and work 40 hours a week.  Yes, that was a fete in itself.  So, it’s not so much accomplishing something I put my mind to, but figuring out what to do next, until I can find that place of work that will help me flourish into my career.

I have a lot of ideas- do family photography, make handcrafts and sell them, host craft parties/demos, do hair, and so on and so on.

I finally finish the elliptical and go do some sit-ups.  I then realize that I need to start a workout regimen, just so I can keep track of what I need to do.

After doing 288, I look at the time and realize I need to do some stretching and get going.

As I go out the door, after a good 50 minutes of a workout, I look in the trash.  I find 2 recyclables.  Yes, when My Husband lost his job 5 years ago, we started skimming the trash to get recyclables.  They don’t pay A LOT, but it does help with gas or extracurricular activities.  It also gives me an incentive to go to this particular gym.

I get in my car and roll all the windows down, including opening the sunroof, as I need to cool down from the workout.

I get over to Target and make a mental note that to hurry, because if I need to use the restroom, there is no restroom at Target, anymore.  Well, at least a safe one.  I prefer not to have a peeping Tom watch me go to the restroom.

I grab my stuff and check out.  I think to myself, “This poor guy who looks like a bum, checking me out, must not be happy here.  But, because of our society and we allow our young ones to rule the world, he’s given no chance to succeed.”

When I go to get my stuff that’s been bagged, he’s got food with clothing items, cold stuff with Goo Gone, and 3 bags stuffed to the brim.  I say nothing, because the poor guy left to another register.  So, I take it upon myself to rebag most of the stuff.

Then, a woman assumes that I’m waiting for a register, gets my attention by saying, “He’s open on 10.”

I tell her, “I’m done, but the poor guy couldn’t bag my stuff.  He’s got food with clothing.  Just wait a sec.”

“Can I get by?” She so rudely says.

“No, just wait a sec, I’m almost done!” I tell her firmly.  I then remark, “Geez, can’t anybody think of the other person.  Here I’m doing someone else’s job.  I’m then told to move it along by another customer who can wait just a few seconds.” I say loudly.

I finish and say, “There, that’s how you bag things and you, madame, can now go to register 10.”

OH MAH GAWSH!  I need to just get home and start on other things.

After getting my stuff into the car and making my way home, I call My Husband to wake up and help me bring the things up.

Luckily, I was able to find a spot right next to our place.  I take half of the stuff up and My Husband took the other stuff up.

After putting the stuff away, I check off my To-Do List that I started a few days ago.  I remind myself that I need to come up with a way to keep me on track, as I know that if I do, I can keep myself busy.

I then tell My Husband that I need to take a nap. I then noticed that Toshiko wasn’t around.  I asked if he was going to join us for dinner.  My Husband said yes, that he’ll be by around 4ish.

Good, I have time to nap and shower.

After sleeping for 20 minutes, I realize that I need to shower.  I STINK.  After the shower, I was able to sleep in my papasan chair for another 20 minutes, when Toshiko’s feet start making their way up the stairs.

He lets himself in and I make way in to the kitchen.  He then asks, “Tetsudai imasu ka?”  Can I help you?

“Can you please make the hamburger patties?” I ask.

I then ask My Husband to turn on the bar-be-que downstairs.

Toshiko sees all the meat I’m going to grill.  I have pork chops, chicken legs, and the burgers.  I can see his expression.  So, I explain, “Yesterday, I took out the pork and chicken to cook yesterday, but didn’t.”  I then continue, “I figured I can at least cook those up and then use them later this week.”

“Oh goo eyedeeah,” he says.

When dinner is ready, we all sit down to talk and discuss.

Toshiko goes first and says, “Areesha, you mayku serufu beezee.  Sahmu tihmu ok.  Batsu, sahmu tihmu need to reesen to God.”  Hmmm, much like the verse I had today at the gym.

He then continues, “Daybee, you cantsu waytu too rongu too maku deesheezun.  Need to harree atsu begeeningu, nahtsu endu.”

Yeah, he hit it on the nose with both of us.  He wasn’t trying to say that he’s not proud of what we’ve accomplished so far.  But, how we should live our lives now.

After we eat, we take a walk to the Sink Hole.

Here, I tell My Husband that I’m really proud of him that he’s willing to work two jobs and help keep the house clean.  So, he can put in 2 scoops.

I also tell him that I’m really proud that he’s taken the initiative to look into library schools and actually reach out to them.  For that, he can put in another scoops.

My Husband then tells me that he’s proud that I went to the gym and have tried to keep the weight that I’ve lost off and have continued to keep up with the weight loss.  For that, I can put in 2 scoops.

He then points out that I don’t just sit in front of the tv and vegetate.  He’s noticed that I am crocheting little projects and working on a sweater.  So, I can put in 2 scoops.

After putting in our 8 scoops, that we try to make as big as possible, we look down.  The Hole is starting to fill up a bit.  The long ladder may not have to be used again.

Toshiko tells me that I can stay in my bed one more night.  In the morning, he may not be available.  Therefore, the ladder will not be available.  He sees that both of us are going to ask what’s going on.  He then says, “Imu going to stahtu Tai Chi and itsu atu seekusu inu mohningu.”

“Oh, Chinese exercise, huh?” I point out.

“Oh, dontsu be so nehrow mihndu,” He points out.

My Husband just looks at us and shakes his head.  He doesn’t know if he should stop us both or to laugh.

“Ok, well, I’m going back home to make a list of the goals I want to accomplish for June and this week,” I point out.

“I’m going back home to sleep,” My Husband says.

“Ok, Imu goingu homu to watchee moobee,” Toshiko says.

And, that’s how we bidded each other good night, tonight.

Day 43 In the Sink Hole


Day 43 In the Sink Hole wakes me up with Toshiko yelling down the hole to wake up.  Oh Geez, I look at the cellphone which is my alarm clock!  Yikes!  It’s 6:30!  I should’ve been up 30 minutes ago. I try to get up, but I’m sore.

Yesterday, I walked down 16 flights of stairs because we had a fire drill at work.  I was able to do that as well as get more than the amount of steps I’ve committed myself to, but I’m still sore.

I see the ladder being shoved down the hole.  I push myself up and gather my stuff to go up the ladder.  It’s still the long ladder, but with everything that’s been going on, I think we’ve kinda forgotten how deep the hole is.

I finally graduated from college.  However, I still have 1 more class left.  That starts on June 13th.

Work has been the same, except we got a new guy on board, PS.  He seems to be really good.  We shall see if he can keep up with the chargebacks and PE.

Finally getting to the top, I apologize saying that I’m so sore from the day before.  Toshiko asks, “Nan deshoo?”  What’s going on?

I explain that we had a fire drill and that I had to go down 16 flights of stairs.  My calves are taking the brunt of it all.

We finally make it to my place so I can get ready for work.  I’ve decided to forego the makeup.  However, I did put on eyeline.

I then realize that tomorrow I will be 43!  OMG!  Where has the time gone?!?  I don’t feel 43.  I feel the same that I did when I was 33 or even 23.  My attitude and outlook on life has changed, my appearance may have changed, but mentally and physically, I still feel like I did at 23.  Well, except for the calves.  But, I think even at that age, after doing 16 flights of stairs and then walking 12,427 steps, I would be sore and slow as well.

I think because I don’t smoke, drink in moderation, exercise, drink my water, and constantly challenge myself, that I don’t have time to truly think of all the ‘old’ things about me.

I think all of this while I’m showering and then realize that I haven’t prayed to God.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Please help me get through the day.  I’m a bit sore and slow.  But, I know I can make it through.

I have many things I’m grateful for.

  1. You’ve allowed me to finish school and get through all the tests that came along with it.
  2. My husband finally got a job in the library.
  3. We have all the luxuries that one can have to get through each day.
  4. Both of our cars are working
  5. My family is well.

As I quickly, as my body would allow me, get ready for work.

Toshiko is working in the kitchen, making my breakfast and lunch.  I asked outloud, “if you haven’t started on the breakfast, I would like an apple with peanut butter.  We don’t have any bananas.”

“Ok,” Toshiko yells out.

Mental note: Get bananas after work today.

I’ve gotten myself together.  I feel a bit casual.  I remind myself that I need to take the clothes to the dry cleaners on Saturday.

Oh Wow!  This Saturday I can actually SLEEP IN.  That gave me the energy that I needed.

Toshiko notices a smile go across my face.  He asks, “Why yuah so happee?”

Excitedly, I say, “I get to sleep in this Saturday!”  I even giggle about it.

“Yuah putsu so machee hahdo wahku hoa sukuru.  Ok,” he says.

I make my way to work and realize that with my new desk, I can do certain things before taking all my stuff to the breakroom.  With the new guy, he took my old desk.  However, that was a blessing in disguise.  I don’t have to listen to PE complain about the managers or pick at PO.  I don’t have to listen to PY chomp on her gum or hear her eat.  Most importantly, I don’t feel like we’re sitting ontop of each other.  However, on the contrary, the desk I have feels like I’m exposed in the back even more.  I don’t have a u-shape area.  It’s now an L-shape.  Oh well, take the good with the bad.

Work is still the same, except that I don’t have to do the chargebacks.  That was a shocker, but after 1 day, I got over it.  Even though, I had put so much time and effort in getting it to where it is today.  Hopefully PS will follow my lead and keep it up.  If not, that’s on him.  I taught him the importance of recording everything and being detailed in the explanations.  So, who knows.

Lunch came and Boss Lady 2 ordered pizza for us, because the guys had a working lunch or meeting during lunch.  PO wanted me to join them.

PE made mentioned that I had graduated and asked how it felt to be an adult.  We then got on the subject of me working at the company.  Hmmmm.

In 2 weeks, I have an interview with another company.  The recruiter for this company seems to be making it difficult for me to join this company.  Sometimes as of late, I feel like it’s back to Disney, with playing mind games with me trying to get ahead.  Who knows.  Maybe I’m just making it more than what it ought to be.

As soon as we’re done eating, I leave and go on my walk as they start to adjourn.

Today, end up window shopping at the outlet.  I know that I’ve been losing weight.  But, I still have plenty of clothes that fit me fine.  But, to just look and see if another size down fits, is just as fun as actually buying the item.

I get back to the office and start calling the branches for their units.  Within a half hour, I’m done with the project.  Wow!  If I had the chargebacks to do, I would have to wait until Friday to try to finish these.

I spoke too soon.  PO brings some over.  He makes it sound like their due tomorrow.

I start to fume, because when I look at them, he’s attempted to do them, but they’re not done correctly!  Furthermore, one of the coversheets has the wrong fax number.  Oh even better, not all of the information is there for another one!

I then go to Boss Lady 2 and say, “Ok, now I’m being taken advantage of.”  I continue to ask, “Are the guys doing their own chargebacks?”

“No, PS is supposed to do them,” she says.

“Hmmm, PO just brought these over and insisted I do them,” I explain.

“Oh, maybe PS is busy?”  she asks.

“I will have to ask,” I point out.  I then continue, “I don’t mind doing these, since I already started on them.  I also don’t mind if PS needs help, but they need to ask.”

“Totally,” Boss Lady 2 agrees.

I then finish the chargebacks and then go back to my desk.  I call PO over and tell him nicely not to do that again, that PS is supposed to do them.

While I was doing them though, there were a couple that were due in the next few days and one that was overdue!

So, I go to PS to give him the hard copies and mention the ones that are overdue and coming up.  He’s grateful that I had mentioned these.

I had to remind myself walking away, “God has this under control.  I don’t need to help Him.  I just need to trust Him and do good.”

After work, I make my way home, where Toshiko and My Husband are wondering about what to do for dinner.  Luckily, I had stopped at the grocery store to get bananas and got a roasted chicken as well.  I’m planning on eating it with the vegetables I took with me to work.

They were ever so grateful.  I then ask Toshiko, “What’d you do when I was out, due to gakko?”

“Tomodachi no ouchi ikimashita.  Gohan o tabemashita,” he explains.  He went to his friends house.  They ate meals.  Wow was all I could think.

My Husband then tells us of a school that he saw that would further his career in the library field.  I tell him to act upon it.  I’d rather be paying for school than a home anyway.

Seriously, a home has too much work.  You have to care for the yard.  If something breaks, you have to pay for that as well.

After we eat, Toshiko brings us over to the hole.  He gives us a verse to ponder on, Romans 12:1-2, especially the Message’s version.

 1-2 So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

That was his response to our conversation.  He then turns to both of us and gives us the go ahead to do our ritual.

I tell My Husband that I’m proud that he took the initiative to look this schooling up.  So, he can put in 2 scoops.  I also mention that he was patient while waiting for the go ahead as to when he would start his new 2nd job.  So, he is instructed to put in 2 more scoops.  I then add that yesterday, he had cleaned the house and vacuumed the living room, so another 2 can go in.

My Husband then takes his turn and tells me that he’s proud of me getting my bachelor’s.  So, I can put in 2 scoops.  He’s also proud that I’m now starting to look for other places of employment.  So, another 2 can go in.  Lastly, I haven’t spent our money on things that we truly don’t need.  So, another 2 goes in.

After the last scoop, I look down.  The Hole is now looking a bit better.

Toshiko then turns to me and says that I can go home and sleep in my own bed tonight, since My Husband is going to his DGroup.

I ask if he wants to come over and watch some tv, although, I may do some cleaning.

He declines, saying that he’s meeting a friend of his to fix something.  I just look at him and laugh.  It’s amazing how this little guy who has so much wisdom can have so much energy and friends.  I want to be like him.  I then realize that I need to work on the friendship part.  Hmmmm…